"The youth of our culture can be harshly judged. Teenagers can be labeled and convicted without a sentence, branded with an unruly stigma by the very culture that promotes wild and lewd conduct. Teens are bombarded with a false sense of confidence and freedom to be gained through high risk behavior, portrayed without any real consequences. This outwardly attractive magnet pulls teens in, but as I experienced in my own youth, never fails to let teens down. Some are scarred with very real consequences of their decisions for the rest of their lives. This counterfeit message promotes irresponsibly, while rejecting self control, the essential puzzle piece that enhances self-worth and self-esteem. But self control is not inherent; it must be taught and practiced, encouraged and supported. This is the mission of Long Island Teen Freedom.

Working as a fulltime instructor for this youth development program, I am faced with the challenge and rewards of educating young minds with a message of responsibility amidst a culture of irresponsibility, the value of marriage in a culture of divorce and abuse, and a message of abstinence in a culture of promiscuity and indulgence. Everyday I am surrounded by hundreds of students who are yearning for someone to tell them that they are loved, worthwhile, and worth waiting for, something they may have never heard before. “I am not here to tell you what to do, I am here to give you the truth, and tell you the facts,” I’ll tell the students, “Because you all deserve it. And I know that once you are informed and educated, you can and will make healthier decisions.” It’s a message of self-empowerment, handing teens the keys to their futures, allowing them to unlock the doors.

The LI Teen Freedom staff is usually greeted with rolled eyes and defensive criticism. The instructors are cautiously viewed as intruders who are threatening a natural freedom. But by the end of a 10 or 15 day curriculum, the word “freedom” is seen in a new light, and takes on an entirely new meaning. As one high school student said energetically, “Abstinence is contagious!” This was a brave comment from an 18 year old mother of two, the same girl who walked out of the classroom on the first day of the program. This is but a small insight into a very big change of heart. She, like many other students, begins to see that abstinence is just a part of the bigger picture.

Teens experience physical, emotional, intellectual, and social liberation from the harsh and damaging effects of premarital sexual activity, and other high risk behaviors. They feel the weight of unrealistic standards being lifted off their shoulders, while discovering the ability to be themselves, focused on their goals and dreams, as well as their health and their future. It’s not the losses, but the gains of an abstinent lifestyle that have captured the hearts of thousands of teens across the country. There is a desire to be in control of ones sexuality, not controlled by it.

True protection of body and mind is sought after, in contrast to what our society deems “safe”. As I look forward with confidence in the youth of our culture, I can’t help but recall a sneer comment made to me in the teacher’s lounge of a high school on my very first day. When I was introduced by a co-worker as a new instructor for the program, a young teacher sarcastically remarked something to the effect of “Yeah, good luck. Do you really think it will make a difference!?”-A clear indication of hope lost in a generation seen as a lost cause. I will continually use that experience, and any other critical jab as motivation to defend the dignity of our youth, to inspire an eagerness to recover the freedoms lost in the war of temptation, and to fight for a future of hope, success, and true love."

Written By: Gerard McNicholas, Abstinence Instructor